I really feel it is important to share just how I feel and not hold anything back. I am not sharing to get people to feel sorry for me I just really want to let it out.
Some days happen and life comes at you and you are fine. Other days come and all I do is miss my Mom. No real reason I just do. My heart aches and all I want to do is talk to her. It hits me like a ton of bricks, as if it is knocking the wind right out of me. Today has been one of those days. My poor boys who never had the chance to really meet her. What a great Grandma she would have been to them. How much they are missing out on how much she is missing out on. I have so many questions for her that I will never have answered. I miss her when I go out and see mother and daughters out shopping or eating out. I miss her when my friends talk about there moms. It is very hard and after almost 6 years it hasn't gotten any easier. I very seldom if ever share how I feel about loosing my mom the way I did or how early we did. I love her and miss her and always will. She wasn't perfect who is? She was my mom and my boy's grandma and I would do anything just to have one more conversation with her.
Brit,
ReplyDeleteMy heart goes out to you. When I read this I thought of my experience this past summer when I lost my mom…my dad's wife of nearly 20 years. I tried to explain what it was like, but even my words did not truly do it justice. (The third or fifth post down starts it).
Hope you can 'feel' her around you over the coming days.
Jason
http://teachinfourth.blogspot.com/search/label/Arlene
She would have been a great grandma! I miss her too. I'm sorry that you have to hurt. You don't often express your emotions...and your post brought tears to my eyes. I hope today is better.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine what you go through. I know your mom is watching over you and loves seeing what an amazing mom you are to your boys.
ReplyDelete